Whisper a Prayer for the Dying
by The Sol Blade
Summary: Kilyth Cousland has lost everything, will this affect the fearless leader? Will vengeance be had?


Well this is my first work for DA:O. Hope you all enjoy.

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_The door to the larder swung open and Kilyth and Eleanor Cousland ran in. Their frightened eyes quickly began to scan the room._

"_There... you both are."_

_Both their heads snapped round to find the source of the voice._

"_Bryce!"_

"_Father!"_

_Bryce Cousland was lying on the floor in a pool of his own blood, clutching his side. Kilyth and Eleanor ran over to him and knelt beside the Teyrn, helping him sit up. He spoke slowly, as if every word took all his strength._

"_I was... wondering when you would get here."_

_Eleanor's worried eyes scanned her husband. She had seen her fair share of wounds, and her eyes grew wider with every ounce of information she took in._

"_Maker's blood!" Eleanor exclaimed, her voice trembling. "What's happening!? You're bleeding!"_

_The Teyrn coughed blood, his voice growing weaker with every syllable he spoke._

"_Howe's men... found me first. Almost... did me in right there."_

_Kilyth looked at her father with a painful expression. She couldn't stand to see her father like this; no one should have to._

"_We need to get you out of here, father!" Her voice was terrified, almost pleading. However, she could see the extent of her father's injuries. They were too severe for him to stand, let alone escape with them. But she would not admit it; she couldn't._

_Bryce gave his daughter a solemn look. "I won't survive the standing, I think." _

_Kilyth then knew what she had to do. It was not in question, she said it without thinking. "Then we will stay and defend you."_

_Eleanor looked at her daughter, "Once Howe's men break through the gate, they will find us. We must go!" Kilyth did not like this. Her father was in no shape to leave. Leaving would mean..._

_Bryce looked at them both, he clutched his side tighter as another pain shot through him and he let out a groan. "Someone... must reach Fergus... tell him what has happened."_

"_You can tell him yourself father!" Kilyth's voice was growing more desperate. She would not lose her father, not like this._

"_I... wish I could." Bryce let out another groan of pain and slipped from Eleanor's hold and landed on the hard floor with a thud, causing more blood to escape from his wounds._

"_Bryce, no! The servant's passage is right here. We can escape together, find you healing magic." Eleanor's voice had grown as desperate as her daughter's. She was not about to lose her husband easily._

_Bryce simply shook his head, "The castle... is surrounded.... I cannot make it." His voice was solemn._

"_I'm afraid the Teyrn is correct. Howe's men surround the castle, but they have not yet discovered this exit. Getting past will be difficult," a new voice greeted them in the darkness. Kilyth and Eleanor spun around and Kilyth immediately recognised the Grey Warden Duncan._

"_You are... Duncan, then? The Grey Warden?" the Teyrna inquired._

"_Yes, your ladyship. The Teyrn and I tried to reach you sooner," replied Duncan._

_Eleanor turned to Kilyth and offered her a weak smile. "My daughter helped me. Maker be praised."_

_Kilyth turned to the Warden, who looked at her and too offered her a weak smile, "I am not surprised." This was hardly the time for compliments._

"_Are you going to help us, Duncan?" Kilyth enquired to the Warden, all the while admiring the skill and power that he seemed to radiate._

_Eleanor's voice grew in sincerity, "Whatever is to be done now, it must be done quick! They are coming!"_

_Bryce looked at Duncan. "Duncan, I beg you. Take my wife and daughter to safety." The Teyrn was pleading, begging for the Warden's help._

"_I will your lordship, but... I fear I must ask for something in return." Duncan's voice was sombre; he was not the kind of man to demand something in return for humane acts. However, the situation was dire._

_Bryce's expression grew desperate, "Anything!" And he meant what he said. He would truly give anything for the safety of his wife and daughter in this desperate hour of need._

"_What is happening here pales in comparison to the evil now loose in this world. I came to your castle seeking a recruit; the Darkspawn threat demands that I leave with one."_

"_I... I understand." Bryce's face grew grim. He knew what Duncan was asking. He had denied it not the morn before. But now he had little choice._

_Kilyth's face grew worried. "Are you... talking about me?" Her voice was trembling._

"_You fought your way to me through Howe's men. I think the Maker's intention is clear."_

"_I will take the Teyrna and your daughter to Ostagar to tell Fergus and the King what has happened. Then, your daughter joins the Grey Wardens," Duncan explained, swapping his gaze between Kilyth and Bryce._

"_So long as justice comes to Howe... I agree." The Teyrn's face was twisted with rage. He spat Howe's name. This Howe was not the man he knew, and he hoped he got the slow, painful death he deserved._

_Duncan turned towards Kilyth, "Then I offer you a place within the Grey Wardens. Fight with us." _

_Kilyth looked away. What should she do? She couldn't leave her father here. Yet she couldn't deny her father's wishes. Eleanor gave her a pleading look. After a minute of deciding, she spoke up. _

"_I... I accept your offer." A tear slid down her face; there was no way to win here. In accepting her father's wishes, she had condemned him to death._

_Duncan stood. "We must leave quickly then."_

_Eleanor looked at her husband, "Bryce, are you... sure?" She questioned. This was a mad idea._

_Bryce returned her gaze, "Our daughter will not die of Howe's treachery. She will live, and make her mark on the world."_

_Eleanor gave Bryce a sad smile. She knew what she had to do. She turned to her daughter, "Darling, go with Duncan. You have a better chance to escape without me."_

_Both Kilyth and Bryce looked at her wide-eyed._

"_Eleanor!"_

"_Mother!"_

_Kilyth was almost in tears. "I won't let you do this- I can't!" She was shaking, fighting back the urge to just break down and cry. _

"_Hush, you two. I'll kill every bastard that comes through that door to buy you time. But I won't abandon your father!" There was deep emotion in Eleanor's voice. Duncan could only stand and watch; being a Grey Warden, he decided he could not involve himself in this decision. This was theirs to make alone. _

"_NO! Mother, I won't let you sacrifice yourself!" Kilyth was crying now, she could not hold it back any longer. Her mother simply looked at her. _

"_My place is with your father. At his side, to death and beyond."_

_Duncan had seen many things in his lifetime, but few compared to the heartache and pain he was witnessing now. Bryce gave Duncan a small nod. He returned the gesture; he knew what it meant. Get the daughter out. No matter the cost._

_He grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her back from her parents. It was one of the cruellest things he had done his entire life; he hated it. Yet he had to carry out the Teyrn's wishes._

"_No! Let me go!" Kilyth screamed; but, however much she tried, she could not break free from Duncan's grasp._

_Eleanor turned to her husband, who was lying in her arms._

"_I'm... so sorry it's come to this, my love..." he managed to splutter out._

"_We led a good life and did all we could. It's up to our children now." She embraced her husband while he turned to his daughter._

"_Then... go, pup. Warn your brother. And know that we love you both; you do us proud." _

_Kilyth simply cried; she had given up trying to resist. She knew what was to happen, but that didn't mean she had to like it._

_A thunderous sound broke through the silence, and they all looked at the direction of the Larder door. The gate. Howe's men had gotten through. What little time they had just got shorter._

_Duncan pulled Kilyth towards the servants' exit. She stole one last glance at her parents. Eleanor looked at her, with deep sadness and yet love, in her eyes._

"_Goodbye, darling."_

_That was the last thing she heard her mother say._

_Duncan was dragging her away; she heard the sound of a battle cry. Her mother's. Steel upon steel. And then suddenly, nothing._

_----_

Kilyth shot up from her slumber, gasping for breath. She was covered in a cold sweat. This was the fifth night in a row that she had had that dream. It had plagued her since the Guardian of the Urn of Sacred Ashes had asked her whether she had thought she had failed her parents. Kilyth ran a hand through her chin-length red hair and let out a long sigh. Sleep would not come easy tonight.

She pulled a shirt and trousers over her night shirt and left the safety of her tent to sit by the fire. As always, Shale was standing guard; golems didn't need to sleep, after all. Shale didn't even acknowledge her, but Kilyth had no doubt that she was aware of her presence. She was probably contemplating the many different ways she could kill birds, or 'damnable feathered fiends!', as she preferred to call them.

The camp fire seemed to offer Kilyth a brief measure of comfort; however, it was hardly enough to push her current thoughts from her mind. She allowed the dancing flames to mesmerise her, but she could not help but remember the events that took place atop that mountain.

--_-_-

_Kilyth, Alistair, Leliana and Wynne ran through the entrance to the temple and slammed the door behind them._

"_A High Dragon!?" Kilyth shouted. Everyone else was too busy catching their breath to reply._

"_Well... put it this way... This would be no fun without the occasional pants soiling, now would it?" a slightly cheerful voice replied._

"_Thank you for that, Alistair. I shall cherish that thought forever," Kilyth replied sarcastically._

_Alistair simply smirked. "Hey, it's what I'm here for." The three women simply rolled their eyes, and Alistair's smirk grew wider._

_After a few seconds, Leliana spoke up. "This place is unlike the rest of the temple.... It is... unblemished."_

_A figure was standing in front of the only other door in the room. The party hesitantly approached._

"_I bid you welcome, Pilgrim." The figure's voice was almost ethereal, as if he was not entirely of this world._

_This was hardly the strangest thing that she had seen in the past few months, and she managed to keep her calm._

"_I have come for the Urn of Sacred Ashes."_

"_You have come to honour Andraste," the Guardian replied. "And you shall, if you prove yourself worthy."_

_Kilyth gave the Guardian a pleading look. "But I need the Ashes to cure a noble man."_

_The Guardian simply shook his head. "Still, you must prove yourself worthy. It is not my place to decide your worthiness. The Gauntlet does that. If you succeed, you will see the Urn, and be allowed to take a small pinch of the Ashes for yourself. If not..."_

_Kilyth was tired of all this delaying. First Kolgrim, then a flaming dragon, now this. She needed that Urn! "All right, let's get this over with then."_

_The Guardian focused his full gaze upon Kilyth. "Before you go... there is something I must ask. I see that the path that has led you here was not easy. There is suffering in your past: your suffering, and the suffering of others. You abandoned your father and mother, leaving them in the hands of Rendon Howe, knowing he would show no mercy. Do you think you failed your parents?"_

_Kilyth was dumbstruck, "How... do you know of my past?"_

"_Your path is laid before me and plain to see – in the lines on your face, and the scars on your heart," the Guardian retorted. He then repeated his original question, in the same monotone. "Do you think you failed your parents?"_

_Kilyth drew a pained breath and bowed her head. She had never had the chance to think about it in great detail. There was always some other pressing matter at hand. She had never had the time to ask herself, but in the few seconds, she immediately knew the answer... but could she tell this Guardian and let her companions hear? She was supposed to be the rock that kept everyone going. If she lost heart, then the entire group would suffer._

_A single tear crept its way down her chin and looked up to face the Guardian. There was no emotion in his... its eyes. It had no right to demand this answer._

_Her voice was shaky, but she managed to keep her composure, "My answer is my own, Guardian."_

"_Very well, you know your own heart." Her companions looked at each other quizzically. Why had she withheld her answer?_

_The Guardian then peered into the hearts of her companions; but, unlike her, they answered his questions._

_The Guardian's desire to peer into the hearts of others was sated for now, and he allowed them to pass into the Gauntlet. After many riddles, they were allowed to venture deeper. A figure was standing through the door that had just been opened, facing away from them. As they drew close, he turned round and spoke._

"_My dearest child..."_

_Kilyth recoiled as if she had been hit. It wasn't possible..._

"_F-Father?" She trembled. Her companions' eyes widened. Kilyth never spoke about what happened to her parents, and no one dared asked. _

"_You know that I am gone, and all your prayers and wishes will not bring me back. I see the pain and anger you carry. I know you fear to give it voice, but rest assured, my child, the Maker knows your heart. Now go, carry with you my love and my forgiveness, pup." Bryce gave one last, loving smile, and with a flash, was gone._

_Kilyth let out a cry and fell to her knees. Tears were flowing freely, and she hung her head so the rest could not see. They simply looked at each other dumbstruck, completely lost at what to do. However, as quickly as this madness started, Kilyth shot up and turned to face the group. There were no traces of tears on her face, and she looked as if nothing had just happened. _

"_Come on," she stated. "This Urn isn't going to find itself," before promptly turning around and marching forward. Alistair, Wynne and Leliana looked at each other; they definitely had to confront her about this._

_Suffering indeed._

----

Kilyth shivered; despite the fire's efforts, the night air was growing colder. She felt a blanket being draped over her shoulders and looked up to see three people sitting across from her. She shook her head; she wasn't in the mood.

"Go back to sleep. Leave me alone."

"No," all three voices replied in unison. It seemed they would not be deterred so easily. Kilyth shook her head in defeat and brought a hand up to rub her brow.

"Alright, then. What do you want?" It seemed Kilyth couldn't win here. She might as well just go along with their wishes.

Alistair was the first to speak, "We want to talk about that happened in the Gauntlet. There are many questions you need to answer." His usual air of humour was gone, instead she detected sincerity.

"Yes, we are all very worried about you," Leliana spoke next; her voice was full of concern for her friend.

"We are only concerned for you, we wish to know what is causing you this much pain." Wynne added.

"There is nothing to talk about." She sighed and shook her head. Couldn't they just leave her alone?

"Oh, on the contraire, my dear, there is everything to talk about. You periodically check we are all doing well. You helped me find my half-sister, you helped Leliana with Marjolaine and you helped Wynne find Aneirin. You act so selflessly. If you think we are going to just let this slide, then you've got another thing coming," Alistair retorted.

Kilyth groaned in exasperation, "Fine! What do you want?"

In truth, the party knew very little about their leader's past. Like all Warden's, she had given up her family name when she was recruited. Alistair had known her the longest; however, they had met at Ostagar, and there were more important things to do than sit with her over some cheese and biscuits and inquire about her past. As the other companions had come rolling in, there were more important things to deal with, so no one knew much. All they knew was that she came from Highever, and she had lost her entire family prior to travelling to Ostagar. However, if these three had their way, the veil surrounding their leaders past would be lifted. For better, or worse.

"It seems that every question that was directed at you during the Gauntlet was about your parents. That man... the one you called 'father'. That was Teyrn Bryce Cousland. You... You're a Cousland aren't you?" Alistair replied.

Kilyth sighed; it seemed there was no escape now. "...Yes. I am the last of the Couslands... and... and if my brother is dead, then I am the Teyrna of Highever."

The three drew a breath. They had expected as much, but it was still a shock to hear it.

"What... what happened?" Leliana asked.

Kilyth spoke quietly, barely a whisper. It was clear to her companions that these memories tore her apart. "My father received the call to scramble to Ostagar from King Cailan. He was to march south with our troops with the Arl of Amaranthine, Howe." She spat his name; they had never seen such disgust. "The Arl arrived one night, claiming his forces were delayed due to weather problems. However, the Darkspawn threat demanded that our forces leave that day. A full 9 out every 10 men were to leave. My father suggested that our forces would leave that night, and the Arl and he would leave tomorrow." She turned to Alistair. "Duncan was in Highever, seeking recruits for the Wardens, and he expressed his interest in me; however, my father would have nothing of it. I was instructed to go tell my brother that he was to leave that night. After that, we retired."

Her expression grew more pained as she continued.

"I awoke in the night to the sound of fighting. Some men tried to kill me, but I dispatched them. They all bore Howe's crest on their shields. He betrayed father and attacked us while our troops were away. I found my mother, and we left to find my father. My brother's wife and son were slaughtered in their beds, and we both swore that we would make Howe pay. We eventually found my father, who lay bleeding in the larder, next to the servant's entrance. Duncan arrived and told us that Howe's men had control of the castle. I was drafted into the Grey Wardens, as there was no other option. I was forced to leave my mother and father to the hands of Howe as I fled to safety with Duncan. There... happy now?"

Alistair, Leliana and Wynne looked at each other mouths open in shock and eyes widened. They had not expected something like this. It was suddenly so clear the suffering that their leader had to endure every day, and the questions of the Guardian had no doubt hardly helped. But, they had said they would get to the bottom of it, and so they pressed on.

"And the Guardian's question- do you think you failed your parents?" Wynne asked. Kilyth hung her head, the tears were flowing again. She mumbled something, but no one else could hear.

"Pardon?"

Kilyth spoke slightly louder; but, her head was still hung, and no one could hear her.

"You're going to have to speak clearer, Kilyth," Leliana spoke.

Her head shot up. "YES!" she screamed at them at the top of her lungs. "Yes, I failed them! I should have defended them to the death! They brought me into this world; they gave me life. The least I can do is offer it up for them in return." She couldn't hold it in anymore; she had snapped.

Kilyth felt a hand on her shoulder.

"You are too hard on yourself," Alistair said. "No one's perfect." Her tear-filled eyes looked up into his.

"But..." she started.

"No buts. Do not allow the past to govern your future. To do so only invokes suffering and pain. Look forward. We are all here to support you the way you supported us," Wynne replied. Alistair nodded at the two women, and they both got up and headed back to their tents. He then returned his gaze back to his fellow Warden.

"Would you like some time alone?" Kilyth simply nodded in return. He brought up his hand and wiped the tears from her face; she offered a weak smile in return.

"When we find Howe, I won't stop you," he whispered to her. Kilyth nodded once more and returned her gaze to the fire. Alistair stood up and made his way back to his tent.

"Alistair..."

He turned his head to face her.

"Thank you."

He smiled and nodded, carrying on his way back to his tent.

As much as she hated to admit it, they were right. She couldn't live in the past. Yes, it brought her unbearable pain that her parents were gone, but bottling it up like this was not helping. She would mourn her past, yes, but why bring up old wounds? She would live for the future.

And _vengeance_.

----

The door in the dungeon swung open, and the party ran through.

"Well, look what we have here. Bryce Cousland's spitfire all grown up, and still playing the man."

Kilyth stopped in her tracks. Here he was, Howe. Her face contorted into a look of pure hatred. This man had ruined her life; there would be no words between them. She turned to Alistair, who simply nodded in return. She turned to face Howe. She dropped her shield with a dull clang, and she drew the dagger that was held on her left thigh. Kilyth dropped into an aggressive stance, her family sword facing forward, and her dagger held in reverse grip.

Howe barely had time to draw his weapons before she leaped for him. Each attack was a killing blow, and he barely managed to parry them. Alistair, Wynne and Leliana also sprung into action. Alistair sprung forward, cutting down one of Howe's guards in one broad arc before engaging another. Leliana proceeded to rain arrows upon the mages that were accompanying Howe, shortly thereafter being joined by Alistair, who had dispatched his second guard with a brutal uppercut from his shield, breaking the man's neck. Fortunately, Wynne was not needed; she simply stood aware and ready to cast an array of healing spells if things took a turn for the worse. Though she doubted it would.

Kilyth's aggressiveness was unmatched. Howe was being pushed back, and it wouldn't be long till he was against a wall. He was beginning to tire, as could be seen by his constantly degrading form. Kilyth, however, was growing more relentless with every attack. She hadn't parried a single blow yet. She aimed for the neck in a strike aiming to decapitate; Howe raised both his weapons to block the blow. Even with all his strength behind it, he barely managed it.

That was when she stuck.

Seeing the gap in his defence, she plunged her dagger into Howe's stomach and twisted it through a quarter turn. Howe groaned in agony. He dropped his axe as his strength failed him, and Kilyth slammed him against the wall.

He looked at her with cold, emotionless eyes.

"Maker spit on you. I deserved.... more." He spat the words at her, a mixture of spit and blood coming out of his mouth and finding their way to her face. Kilyth simply snarled in return.

"This is for my parents."

She quickly twisted the dagger through another quarter turn and pulled it out of Howe's stomach causing the Arl to gasp in pain. She dropped her dagger and held the Cousland blade with both hands, span round to gain momentum, and severed Howe's head in one fell swoop.

Hot blood sprayed over her, but she did not care. She had avenged the death of her parents, and her family's blade had seen the price paid in blood. She would not clean it for some time. She turned to face her three companions.

"I..." she started.

"Hush, you did what you had to do. None of us blame you," Alistair interrupted her. Leliana and Wynne nodded their heads in agreement.

She gave a small smile back. "Thank you, for everything."

Her three followers returned the gesture and each hugged her. Kilyth sighed, "I'm sorry for how I acted. You were all right."

"Don't say that too often. It might go to my head," Alistair chuckled. Kilyth smiled again, they always knew how to cheer her up. She thought about what had happened, with her parents, Ostagar and the events leading them to here. Everything happens for a reason. Although there was much suffering in the path that had led her here, she had found happiness in the arms of her new friends; and, though killing Howe hadn't brought her parents back…

It sure was a start.

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My thanks go to SpiritSeer for her work in Beta-ing. Once again I hoped you all enjoyed. Constructive criticism is welcomed so please R&R.


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